Saturday, August 31, 2013

Lucy's Got Some 'Splainin To Do

Ohai Y'all!

Two posts in a week, I'm on a roll! I hope my lovely readers have been having a good week. The weather's been changing again... boo. Lucky for me my arms haven't been terrible, which, taking the barometric pressure changes into account is better than I expected. Unlucky for me, my back has been killing me! I don't have any known issues with my back and spine, me thinks the pain is a result of hip issues. I can't stand in one spot for more than 5 minutes. The solution? I'm looking into obtaining inserts for my shoes specifically for back problems. If that doesn't work, my plan b is to go back to using my crutch for instances where I know I'll be standing and or walking for long periods of time. Not ideal... but meh, what can ya do?

Apart from the pain I've been well. I celebrated my Grandma's 81st birthday on Thursday and today would have been my Grandpa's 83rd birthday. So the family celebrated by going to see a local production of "Footloose" and nomming on pizza. Definitely a good start to my weekend :3

Now... on to that title...

See that? See that adorable little pig? That's Lucy, and she's been in time out 5 times over the past two days. Miss Lucy-fer's been a raging asshole. Her crimes range from face and butt biting, fighting with Eleanor and Maggie, and my personal favorite... physically dragging Eleanor away from a food dish. *Sigh* I used to think Frida was naughty. Lucy wins. Lucy is by far the biggest butthead I have ever met. I checked her over and she's in heat, that and the fact that she's a baby explain the behavior. While checking her over I found that someone bit her in the face. Yeah, I tried to have a rational discussion with Lucy-fer that if she keeps acting inappropriately that she will keep getting injured like that. I don't think she listened because apparently she continued acting up while I was at work. The solution? Originally Lucy's time outs were comprised of solo time with a human and being scolded at while lying on her back. Clearly she doesn't care about that, so the new plan is a lil' more jail like. We have a travel case for vet visits. Lucy was tormenting Maggie earlier. Her punishment? Solitary confinement in the travel case. I'll keep ya updated about how the new time out system works. She behaved for the rest of the day after her release, let's hope she learned her lesson.

That's it for now I guess. I'm wishing all my readers a happy and healthy labor day weekend. 

Crippie's Tippie - If your pig gets into a squabble, check their mouths. It's a VERY common area for injuries. 

Monday, August 26, 2013



I hope y'all have had a wonderful week. My week has been pretty good. The weather has been changing again and my arms are feeling it. I've had to wrap each wrist once this week. I'll probably talk to my orthopedist about it, get some x-rays but that's about it. It's gonna have to get pretty bad for me to have surgery.

Moving on, Sunday was a pretty awesome day for me. Why? Cause I got new glasses! Ya see, being a graphic designer means you are staring at a computer for many hours at a time, looking at teeny tiny details. And this royally messes with your eyes. My eye sights been getting worse since my freshman year in college. Over the past few months it's gotten pretty bad. I was having more and more problems reading and seeing crap in general. So, over the weekend I took advantage of some dandy sales and got my ass over to Lenscrafters for a new pair of specs. The appointment went pretty well, except for that whole stupid glaucoma test they do. The thought of blowing air into my eye freaked me out and I kept moving. After I a few attempts I realized I needed to suck it up and get the damn test over with. Once that was over I had my actual exam. It's funny, I mentioned to the doctor that I have a genetic disorder and that it shouldn't effect my vision. Her response "your disorder might not effect your vision but your meds do!" Apparently all my handy dandy pain meds and anti-inflamatories relax my eyes. Who knew!  Apart from that nifty bit of information the appointment went as to be expected. Once the appointment was over I got to pick out some snazzy new frames. Funness! I have found that on the whole, most shapes of glasses don't work with my face. I've accepted this fact and I turn it into a game of "How terrible can Crippie look?" Here are some of my favorite pics.

It's such a shame those John Lennon/Harry Potter glasses didn't work out. They'd be so bad ass! And yes, I totally tried on a bunch of unattractive hipster glasses and texted various people saying "OMG don't you love my new glasses <3333333333" I can be such an asshole at times. 

After a brief "ok, stop goofing around with hipster glasses" search I found a nifty pair of glasses that suits my face shape. YAY ME! More importantly, I was able to pick up my glasses within an hour. w000000000000t. As soon as I put on my glasses I was like "HOLY CRAP! EVERYTHING IS SO CRISP!" I kid you not the past few days have essentially been "Read ALL the things!" I'm probably annoying everyone in my house with the whole "I CAN READ THE THING ON THE WALL" jabber. Oh well... wanna see my glasses?

They're not all that different from my old frames, they're slightly rounder and the color is different. Naturally I painted my nails to match my glasses. In case y'all haven't noticed... I'm really excited about being able to see again. It's seriously an amazing feeling. 

And apart from ZOMG I GOT GLASSES news... I've started watching "Orange Is The New Black" on Netflix (three episodes in). I'm not addicted yet, but it's a fun show. It'll keep my occupied for a lil' while at least. BTW if any of you are interested, the lady who plays "Crazy Eyes" was in a recent revival of "Godspell" on Broadway. She did a lovely rendition of "By My Side". You can check it the audio here.

So that's it for tonight. I think I'll be spending the next few days reading whatever I can get a hold of.

Crippie's Tippie - Designers need to be super careful not to strain their eyes. Time away from the computer is a good thing.

Tuesday, August 20, 2013

Random Crippie Crap!

Ohai Y'all!

I hope y'all are having a lovely week thus far. Thankfully I've been pretty well. I don't exactly have a lot of material to write a blog post about, so in the spirit of blogging regularly I figured I'd update y'all on all the random happenings of my life.

- My arms have for the most part been cooperating with me. YAY! They'll still catch from time to time, but it's just for a moment and it goes away. I haven't had to brace either of my wrists in a week. That's kinda a big deal cause I usually have to brace one of my arms at least once a week. Me thinks it was a weather shift causing all these problems. Freaking weather.

- The piggies are fatties. Tonight I was finally able to weigh the babies. Eleanor is a whopping 1,200 grams (a little shy of 2.5 pounds), Prudence is 1,000 grams, and Lucy is 1,050 grams. At least I think Lucy is 1,050 grams... you need to sit still to get an accurate measurement, and Lucy does not know the meaning of "sit still". I also gave Eleanor and Lucy their first ever nail trims. I am happy to report that I lived through the ordeal. Eleanor will forgive me sooner or later.

- Helen hasn't been feeling very well over the past few days. She's not sick or anything, but she got five shots on Saturday, and she's a terrible patient. So we've had a stoned lil' Shih Tzu on our hands. She spent the weekend either whining, crying, or sleeping, sometimes all three at once. Don't worry though, she started feeling better today.

- Angel has also been feeling "off" she has allergies and skin related stuff going on. She got some new medicines over the week and she has been bouncing off walls and humping pillows like a mad woman. She's quite happy with her life at the moment.

- I bought a book last week. If you knew me you'd know how much of a shock this is. I don't read, at all. I just don't have the attention span for it. What did I obtain? I bought "Maus" by Art Spiegelman. It's a graphic novel about the Holocaust. While I can't really read, I lurv me some graphic novels. The words are broken up enough to keep my attention, plus the pictures help too. I haven't started reading it yet, but I look forward to it. Can any of my lovely readers recommend any other good graphic novels for me? I've already read (and loved) Persepolis and I'm currently reading "The Walking Dead" issue by issue.

- I was surprisingly social this weekend. I had some friends over on Saturday to meet the piggies and have ice cream. My friends loved my piggies and my piggies loved my friends, judging by how the pigs opted to not wee on anyone! On Sunday I had another friend over for pizza, a movie, and course playing with pigs. The babies got oodles of attention this weekend and I'm pretty sure they enjoyed themselves.

Well, that's about it over here. I hope y'all have a lovely week. Until next time!

Crippie's Tippie - Have issues reading? Give graphic novels a go. 

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

Seven Nation Arm-y


Sorry I've been away from the blog, I do have an explanation though. But first... PIGGIES!

The piggies are continuing to settle down and accept their roles in their little "society". Nellie is the boss pig, and Lucy has lovingly turned into her evil little minion. Lucy will gladly do Nellie's bidding. Recently Nellie's bidding mainly consists of nipping Eleanor in the butt. Lucy has been put in time out on multiple occasions for cornering Eleanor and repeatedly biting her. NOBODY BITES BABY IN A CORNER! Eleanor has kinda turned into a lil' recluse, she enjoys her hide-y places. It's funny how the song she's named after fits her personality. Prudence has probably taken the adjustment the easiest, her hobbies include comfortably lounging wherever possible and hanging around Maggie. Maggie has grown to accept the babies and she's actually quite fond of the attention they give her.

Last night I gave Eleanor some extra attention because miss Lucy-fer decided to block her into a corner on two separate occasions in one day! Poor baby needed some snuggles. So she got some extra cuddle time with me watchin' TV. While her experiences with "Wheel of Fortune" didn't amaze her "The Colbert Report" blew her little mind. She stood on my hand and watched the entire episode. She then browsed reddit with me and eventually fell asleep on my arm. Too freaking cute.
God I'm adorable...

Selfie! #NoMakeup ;)

Taking a snooze on mommy
Told ya she was freakin' cute.

Ok... moving on to why I was absent for a lil' over a week. Well...

Yup, BOTH of my arms have been bothering me for the past week or so! GO ME! Bothering is a wee bit of an understatement... MY ARMS FREAKING HURT! I think something either in my right forearm or elbow caught, basically rendering my entire arm useless. I used my handy dandy ace bandage to alleviate the problem for the time being. As for my left... I'm pretty sure something caught in my forearm towards my wrist. Again, ace bandage and hope I can manage it on my own. I wasn't posting because while I technically can type with one hand, I only do that when I HAVE to. Not exactly a comfortable thing to do. Plus, it would take ages to write the damn post! Oh well... fingers crossed that I won't need surgery for these bastards.
At least my nails look awesome :D

The tumors seem to have unhooked themselves for now *knocks on wood*. If it keeps happening then it's off to the orthopedist I go! If it's a problem with the arm I can deal, that would be a fairly simple surgery. If it's in the elbow region... eh... that could be trickier. Anything near a joint is always harder. Even then, it's my right hand... not my dominant one. It would probably be a harder recovery... but I'd live. Meh... in the meantime I'm just gonna act like it won't be a massive problem and hope that my tumors listen.

Crippie's Tippie - If you use ace bandages, try to obtain ones with velcro and or some type of self-adhesive capability. Nothin' worse that getting poked by those stupid pointy metal fasteners. (the ace bandage in the picture is velcro BTW, pretty sure I saved it from a surgery)

Thursday, August 1, 2013

Its For Me To Know And For You To Never Find Out!


Hope you are all having a lovely week thus far. The weather sucked today so I was in a lot of pain, apart from that I've been having a dandy week. I'm still chillin' with relatives and I'm still a crazy guinea pig lady. The piggies are continuing their adjustment and there appears to be a new power struggle... Lucy somehow got it into her adorable lil' noggin that SHE is the boss! She has been biting butts left and right. Nellie is not pleased with this, but she hasn't attacked Lucy back. She's kinda like "DID SHE JUST BITE ME IN THE ASS? WTF!" Due to this new behavior Lucy has gained the nickname "Lucyfer". We give very loving nicknames in this house. This sudden asshole-ish turn can be chalked up to one thing, Lucy is a baby. Baby guinea pigs are raging assholes. Maggie used to be a raging asshole (when we first met her she was literally using Aggie as a trampoline) but she has since settled down. Frida was a butt for the longest time, and she grew out of most of her butthole tendencies. What do we do about Lucy going through her "terrible twos"? Simple, when we catch her being a butt we give her a gentle flick to the bum, and if she's being a RAGING asshole she goes into time out (you hold them on their backs, a vulnerable position). Sooner or later she'll learn to behave. In the meantime though, it's extraordinarily humorous to watch.

Moving on cripple topics. I'm gonna tell y'all a story about a lil' incident that happened to me a few weeks ago. I'm omitting a crap ton of details, but y'all can get the gist of it. Ok, so here's what happened. I was in a place with a lot of people that I am sorta familiar with, by that I mean I know their names and while I talk with them I know NOTHING about them or their lives. I had an ace bandage around my wrist because it was hurting me, anywhoo... a lady approaches me. The conversation goes as follows...

Lady - Oh no! What's wrong with your wrist?
Crippie - Oh, it's a long story (My general manner is implying that I do not want to talk about it)
Lady - Oh really? 
Crippie - I hurt my wrist
Lady - Oh? (she doesn't leave me alone, she's looking at me, waiting for me tell her what's wrong)
Crippie - Um... carpal tunnel syndrome
Lady - Does that ace bandage help you? (at this point I am getting annoyed)
Crippie - Yeah, it keeps things in place
Lady - I don't like ace bandages... 

She then continued freaking talking to me about ace bandages being constricting. I'm pretty sure that when she left me alone my face was like 0.o . I bet some of my longtime readers are like "Hold up Crippie, haven't you said on numerous occasions that you are comfortable with telling people why you are disabled?" You would be correct. On the whole I'm pretty comfortable with telling people why I am disabled, people are curious and there is nothing you can do about that. But 1 major thing has changed since I said that... I no longer walk with a cane. It was obvious I was sick before so there was no use trying to hide it. Now that I look fairly "normal" and I like for people to consider me as such. These days when people I do not know ask me about something I say "it's a long story" and leave it at that. Most people understand that I am politely saying "none of your damn business" and they respect my wishes. This lady however, either did not understand and or did not care. She does not need to know how sick I am, so I lied and said I had carpal tunnel syndrome. I'm not sure what pissed me off more, the fact that she was trying to pry into my life like that or that even when she got her "answer" she kept asking about my ace bandage. Hypothetically if I did have carpal tunnel... OF COURSE AN ACE BANDAGE HELPS!!! I don't even have it and I know how painful it is. Why do you see people with carpal tunnel wearing wrist braces? BECAUSE IT HELPS RELIEVE THE PAIN! UGH!

Well... that whole experience was irritating to say the least. I wish I could say it was a lone instance, but alas... I had another woman try to wheedle information out of me before. Look, Crippie understands that you lurv yourself some gossip, but it's none of your damn business. Please, respect my wishes when I don't want to talk about it.

Crippie's Tippie - Somebody doesn't wanna tell you something? Don't force them into telling you. Unless your a cop or something, then by all means force away
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