Friday, October 26, 2012

Sandy Land

Why Hello There!

Hurricane Sandy...  yeaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh

I seriously hope that all you guys stay safe and sound over the next couple of days. I live in New York and will probably be on high alert from Sunday through Tuesday night. Well, this certainly explains why I've been in so much pain over the past few days... I CAN PREDICT HURRICANES... YAY ME!!!

But in all seriousness... this Hurricane has the potential to suuuuucccccccckkkkkkkk. Personally, I live on a road with tall trees very close power lines. Hurricane Irene took out one of our trees last year, and the freakin' Halloween snow storm took out some more of 'em. If y'all could sending "STAY WHERE YOU ARE" vibes to my remaining trees it would be greatly appreciated. 

I figured since we're dealing with the "storm of the century" I'd make a quick little checklist of things cripples, guinea pigs, and dogs need.

- Disposable heat or ice packs, hand warmers might also benefit 
- If need be, use glow in the dark tape to mark things in your house (canes, doorways, whatever) 

- Enclosed Hiding places (they need them for warmth)
- Fleece (also warmth)
- Food & Hay for at least a week. If you are running low, Oxbow brand pellets and hay are acceptable
- Disposable Hand warmers (if it gets insanely cold you can wrap one in a sock and put it in their cage)
- If possible, move pigs away from windows, etc
- Bedding, if you use fleece you might wanna pick up some extra because you might not be able to wash it. If you use carefresh I recommend Kaytee Clean and Cozy. 

- Food 
- Coats (if necessary)
- Puppy pads, newspapers, extra paper towels, baggies, garbage bags... anything you might need in the event that it is too dangerous to walk your dog. 

There ya go, I like how most of my tips are for guinea pigs... lol. I really hope that nothing terrible happens to in this storm and that each and every one of my readers makes it through safely. I'm sending "PLEASE DON'T LET ANYTHING BAD HAPPEN" vibes to y'all.

Crippie's Tippie - Don't do anything stupid that might jeopardize your life over the next few days

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Achy Breaky Hips

Oh Hello

I hope y'all are having a lovely week thus far. I didn't have work today, which was good because I was so damn achy today I could hardly move. Basically I stayed in bed with my heat pack all day. Even though Fanny is gone I still have tumors inside my hip sockets... and those also hurt like a mofo. I'm starting to feel better now, but I'm kinda peeved that my day was kinda consumed with pain. Freakin' weather. Oh well, at least the next few days look better.

Anyways, as promised to make up for yesterday's sucky post. Here's some pictures of Helen's Halloween costume. Just a quick pre-face... Helen actually enjoys wearing clothes, plus she gets cold very easily so they do serve some function. Last year she was a unicorn complete with Neil Patrick Harris riding her (Harold & Kumar joke). This year we opted for something a little... different. Any last guesses people?

If you guessed a pink hippo in a tutu... CONGRATULATIONS! You win a cookie. Clearly Helen is super excited about Halloween. I put the costume on her to take the pictures... and she fell asleep. Me thinks it's because it's a really snuggly fabric, guess she considers it to be a blankie. One of these days I'll try to get some photos of Helen the hippo when she's conscious.

If anyone is wondering, Helen is the only animal that has Halloween costumes. Angel does not like clothes nor do want to risk our lives to attempt to put anything on her. The pigs have their guinea bee costume, but I can only keep it on 'em for a few minutes tops. Apart from their general hatred of the costume, they'd probably pee on it if I left it on 'em for more than five minutes. And I just don't feel like washing pee out of a bee costume. In the end Helen enjoys clothes, so Helen wears clothes.

I should totally do a post one day dedicated to Helen's fashions, would anyone like that?

Crippie's Tippie - If your animal hates costumes, don't force 'em to wear one. 

Tuesday, October 23, 2012



As y'all can see I'm slowly workin' on sprucing up the blog. What can I say, a graphic designer is never happy with their work. I do like the concept of this wheelchair dude, maybe I'll dress him up for various holidays! Also, I apologize in advance if the site looks all weird and messed up... messing with coding is a dangerous venture ;) 

I've been trying to figure out blog design and coding for a few months and I'm starting to get decent at it. Practice makes perfect. In the meantime, anybody looking for a new blog header? Badge? Anything?  Shoot me an email, I'd love to make some stuff for you guys.

Part of the reason that I decided to give the blog a little face-lift is that the weather's been changing and I've been really uncomfortable. I can consume myself in the design and distract myself from the pain. It doesn't exactly help me fall asleep any faster, but it helps me focus on other things. I do love me some good distractions, whether it's The Sims or painting my nails... anything to take my mind off of the achy feelings in my hips and legs. I might try a new pillow arrangement one of these days... *shrugs*

Oh, before I forget, I have to mention that my Scensty Fundraiser is still going strong! It's been amazing thus far and for those of you who have contributed I cannot thank you enough. Remember the sale ends on November 3rd, so if any of y'all wanna get some holiday shopping done you should check us out HERE. Also, if scented products aren't really your thing but you still want to help, you can also donate 2 stuffed animals to be given to kids with MHE having surgery. Just email me at or email my friend at if you're interested :)

It looks like it's gonna be another short post tonight. You know what that means? Yup, cute pictures of animals tomorrow. I hear Helen wants to show off her Halloween costume. Last year she was a unicorn, what do you think she'll be this year? 

Crippie's Tippie - Sometimes the best treatment for pain is something to take distract you from it

Saturday, October 20, 2012

Kick-Ass TV Cripple


Hope everyone is enjoying their weekends thus far, and that all my locals are enjoying this KICK ASS WEATHER. It was lovely today and the next couple of days look pretty spiffy too... w00t. My day went relatively well, did the usual work and discuss how Lori in "The Walking Dead" needs to die with my coworkers. 

Speaking of The Walking Dead (which I am obsessed with and will probably be posting about every Saturday cause I'm s'darn excited about each new episode)... the show is about to get more awesome this season for various reasons (apart from hopefully killing Lori). It's actually going to be a very cripple-friendly season! 

Generally speaking cripples on TV have verrryyyy secondary B roles and usually don't contribute much to plot story-lines. The only show I can think of that involved a cripple as the main character is "House"... and that was canceled I don't count it. Currently I can only think of 4 shows that regularly involve cripples, they are...
1 - Family Guy - Joe Swanson plays an active part in the show and gets a fair amount of screen time
2 - South Park - Timmy and Jimmy are freaking awesome, but they don't get a lot of screen or plot time
3 - Glee - at this point Artie exists, but no real story lines revolve around him (and that pisses me off), they also feature actors with Downs Syndrome
4 - The Secret Life of The American Teenager - Also features an actor with Downs Syndrome

If I'm missing any good shows with cripples in 'em... please let me know! 

Now, back to the Walking Dead *Spoiler Alerts for anyone who might be interested in watching any of the past seasons or who hasn't seen the promos for this season*. 

Well, in season one there was a character named Merle, he was your stereotypical racist redneck. He was left for dead in the first season, which worked for me cause he was a racist asshole and I didn't care for it. Turns out this dude is back and better than ever! Why? Long story short he needed to amputate his hand in the first season... thus leaving him with a nub and probably at greater risk for being killed by a zombie. BUT Merle comes back this season in style... WITH A FREAKING MACHETE HAND.  Yup, dude turned it nub into a weapon. Merle Machete Hand (as I lovingly call him) turned his new found crippledness into an advantage, for once the cripple gets to (probably) survive the zombie apocalypse. All because of his shiny new knife hand. Dude is still a complete racist asshole, but I give him props for creativity. For outstanding acts of cripple bad-assery, let's all give Merle a big hand everyone!

Crippie's Tippie - If you do have a nub, consider making weapon attachments for it. It could come in VERY handy (pun intended)

Thursday, October 18, 2012

Nellie & Frida Turn Four!


Hope y'all are having a great week. Things have pretty uneventful on my end. We're kinda working out a system for giving Angel her ear drops... it takes three people but it gets done. Her ears are starting to feel better already. 

The big news for today is that Nellie and Frida are officially four years old! I don't know their exact birthday, but Nellie was between 6-8 weeks old when we obtained her in early December. So I guess and celebrate their birthdays in mid October. I'm definitely a proud mama today :)

These little pipsqueaks have changed soooooooooooooooooo much in the past four years. Nellie started out as a loud, adventurous asshole. Once she grew out of her asshole toddler stage she became a quiet little snugglebug. She can stay on her human's lap for HOURS on end. Nellie is gentle soul who will give you kisses if she deems you tasty enough (she has deemed me to be quite delicious).

Frida also started out as an asshole, a violent one at that. She used to bite people when she was younger. Whenever company would come over they were not allowed to touch her and children were not allowed to hold her for YEARS. Frida used to step on Mama Pig's face to get our attention, I mean she would literally use her mother as a step ladder. Manners were learned with time and now with her new friends and bigger cage Mama's face is no longer trampled. She has learned to appreciate a good cuddle, except she still tries to bite you when she wants to go back in her cage. Frida loves music, especially Lady Gaga. Although she likes anything with a good beat really. Frida has grown in more ways than just maturity... she also uses her double chin as a comfy pillow. 

We celebrated their birthday with food, snuggles, and some Lady Gaga. Needless to say I have some very happy piggies tonight. And how... PIGTURES 

BABY NELLIE!!!!!!!! (I'm kicking myself for not having baby pictures of Frida)

The birthday girls!

I figured they were looking at something really nifty...


Frida being beautiful

Nellie and her "I'm peeing on you" face

Of course we didn't only celebrate ONLY Nellie & Frida's birthday's today. All the pigs had some extra treats to celebrate Emma's birthday as well, even though she will forever be three. I think she'd be happy to know that her sisters and mother are still very well loved and VERY well fed. Miss you Emma, mommy loves you <3

Crippie's Tippie - Cherish every moment you have with your pets, they're only here for such a short while

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Play It By Ear


I hope y'all had a great weekend and Monday. My weekend went as well as it could have considering the circumstances. The unveiling went very well and I got to spend time with my relatives. We paid tribute to my aunt in the best way we could... we ate massive amounts of food and celebrated her life. My aunt was a very special person and she will never be forgotten. As her headstone says "Always loving... always loved."

In non-death related news, my sleep schedule is starting to regulate. Granted, I'm still falling asleep at ungodly hours of the night, but not as terrible as weeks prior. I'll probably obtain some melatonin one of these days to help get my ass to sleep faster.

It's hard to believe it's almost been a month since my surgery, and I'm pretty much fully recovered. The incision area is still a teensy bit sore, but it's completely bearable. The scar hasn't keloided yet, but it is a lovely dark pink color. Now that my sciatic nerve is free from irritation my right leg seems to moving easier, and my limp is getting better, my leg still drags a little... but it's not noticeable to the untrained eye.

In pet news, we have a sad little pooch on our hands. Poor Angel has a double ear infection :( . She HATES having anyone touch her ears and God help you if you try to put medicine in 'em. Let's just say we're gonna have a lot of fun trying to muzzle her twice a day to give her the meds *sigh*. Oh well, the joys of being a pet owner. Angel's probably gonna hate us for the next few weeks. We do have some handy dandy turkey to bribe her into liking us again though. In the meantime she requests healing ninja vibes and healing yummy turkeys.

Crippie's Tippie - Dog mad at you? Feed 'em until they forgive you ;)

Saturday, October 13, 2012

The Limping Dead


Thank y'all for all the awesome suggestions to remedy my friggin insomnia. I used to take tylenol PM every night for well over a year, so naturally I'm now immune to the stuff. Has anyone tried melatonin pills? Do they work?

In the mean time I'm trying to regulate my sleep schedule, but it's certainly a challenge. I had a rather busy day today so hopefully that'll knock me out. I had a long-ish day at work, mainly due to my coworkers and I discussing the return of "The Walking Dead" tomorrow. We all agreed that Lori needs die as soon as humanly possible. If she croaked in the first episode I would not complain. We also discussed our plans for surviving a zombie apocalypse. The general consensus among us was that if we weren't able to barricade ourselves in our homes until the wave of zombies passed, we'd probably die fairly quickly. On the bright side, if I were to become a zombie my limp would be comedically worse than the other zombies. Or I'd probably just end up like bicycle girl and drag my mostly lifeless body with my arms. Yes, this is actually how I spent my day at work.

After work I went to see a stellar performance of "The Last Five Years" at the local community college. Oh my lawd I loved it. The production, sets, orchestrations, acting, EVERYTHING was amazing. It was an amazingly complex two person show about the rise and fall of a relationship. If any of my local readers are interested in seeing it, HERE is the website.

Now, I really should be getting to bed. I have a loooooonnnnngggggg day ahead of me tomorrow. I'm attending the unveiling for my aunt, who passed away last year. While it won't be a "happy" day by any means, I'll get to see some relatives that I haven't seen for a few years. That'll be good at least. Besides tomorrow is not about mourning the dead, it's about celebrating them.

I hope y'all have a lovely Sunday

Crippie's Tippie - Appreciate your relatives while you have them

Friday, October 12, 2012

Crippie Is Ever So Tired

Happy 10/11/12 Everybody!!!!!!!!!!!

I hope my crippled comrades are enjoying this gorgeous fall weather. All the leaves are changing by me, makes my commute to work very pretty and enjoyable.

I've actually been very busy for the past few days. Whether it be work (I'm pretty much back to my regular schedule) or running various errands, I've been pretty active. Thus I am really tired. No big deal, just sleep more, right? Lol, nope. I've been having a wicked bout of insomnia over the past few weeks. It's pretty bad actually, I've been falling asleep at 4, 5, or even 6 in the morning. This lack of sleep and being tired already has entered me into the not so fun realm of tired.

My fellow cripples know what I'm talking about here. You get to a point when "tired" doesn't mean "I need a nap". It gets to a point where you are emotionally tired of everything. I really do try keep a positive attitude but there are bad days when everything gets to you. I'm not sad about being in pain. I'm not angry about my situation. I'm just tired. I try not to let it weight me down too much, I do things like paint my nails or look at funny pictures on reddit to lift my spirits. While it doesn't make the tired feeling go away, it definitely helps lessen it.

Even though parts of my day were less than awesome, it ended on a high note that will help lift the spirits of other kids. We received the orders from my Scentsy Fundraiser, including 10 Scentsy Buddies to be sent to children having surgeries. Thats 10 children who's days will be a little brighter because of some incredible donors. The two for $25 Scentsy Buddy sale is still going on if anyone else would like to help out, just message me for details.

It's things like this that remind me to snap out of it and focus on the bigger picture. Yes parts of my day suckkkkkkkeeeeedddd but they are not the most important events of today. Helping other kids so their days don't suck as much. Now that's important.

I think I'm actually starting to get tired, maybe I'll get to sleep tonight.

Crippie's Tippie - Check out my Scentsy Fundraiser, it ends on November 3rd :)

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

My Dog Is A Psychic Now


As the title suggests, something very interesting happened tonight.

As most of y'all know, I have a blind dog named Helen. She barks whenever she hears noises that displease her. These noises can vary from knock on the door, people shouting, The Jersey Shore, Angel, strangers, the sound of a door opening etc. Helen also sleeps in my bed with me, she likes my pillows and she also takes pride in defending me from serial killers every night.

Anyways, tonight I heard noises which I thought where just my house settling, cause ya know, houses do that. Helen was NOT fond of these noises. Even though she was sleeping she would let out a little *grumble grumble* whenever she heard one. At first I would tell her "Helen, it's the house settling". The settling sounds continue sporadically for another hour or so. Each time Helen grumbles. These sounds were pretty damn faint. I kept looking at Helen like "Everyone else in the house is sleeping! What is wrong with you child?". Eventually these sounds got more and more frequent, and Helen was getting pissed at me. I'm still thinking Helen is an idiot until I hear a massive CRASH! I have bookshelves mounted to my wall. One fell down. Some rather heavy books came crashing down with it. I turned on my light to check out the damage, and even though Helen is blind I swear she was looking at me like "BITCH I TOLD YOU THAT WOULD HAPPEN!". Luckily no harm or damage was done. I guess my books were a little heavy.

Helen wouldn't stop judging me until I have her some treats. After she nommed on a few dog cookies, her smug little ass went back to bed. I'm now convinced that this little squirt is smarter than she looks.

I saved your life. YOU'RE WELCOME!  
Crippie's Tippie - Don't put heavy books on wall mounted shelves


Monday, October 8, 2012


Hello Friends!

I hope y'all had dandy weekends. It was the last few days of my "vacation" so I got to enjoy it. My sister's birthday was on Friday so we went out for an awesome dinner with some relatives on Sunday. If any of my local readers of heard of a place called "Texas Roadhouse" I HIGHLY recommend it. The steaks were freaking amazing.

Moving on, today was my first day back at work! YAY ME! Now that I'm getting back into the swing of things I'm really starting to realize how much of a raging bitch Fanny was. I was in ZERO pain driving to work. I didn't even know that driving hurt before. But now that Fanny is gone driving felt so... normal. Definitely motivates me to drive more often. I opted not to use my crutch when I got to work. Figured the exercise would be good and walking is easier now. It was great to see all of my coworkers and I had a little "welcome back" sign on my desk. I jumped back into work and I found it slightly easier to focus. My scar would sometimes hurt for a second, but it wasn't bad and it quickly passed. I'm really happy to be back at work, reckon I'm one of those people that actually enjoys working.

Even though I was on a modified schedule today, I was tired when I got home. I pretty much just ate and watched several episodes of "Breaking Amish" on my computer. I don't care if it's probably highly fabricated... it's interesting AND ADDICTIVE!

I guess that's all for tonight folks. Tomorrow marks three weeks since my surgery. Guess I'll have to celebrate by posting cute animal pics.

Crippie's Tippie - Modified schedules are a beautiful thing.

Saturday, October 6, 2012

Summary of a Surgery


I can't believe it's been almost three weeks since Fanny's removal. My little "vacation" is almost over and I go back to work on Monday. While having a little break from work was nice, I'm rather looking forward to getting back to being a productive member of society again.

Today I figured I'd break down how my surgery and recovery went and how I improved as the days progressed...

Day of Surgery - At first I was going to say something about how little pain I was in, but then I tried to think about that day and I realized I do not remember much about it. I remember getting up to go to the bathroom, being in my car going home, walking up some of my stairs, and thats about it. I guess I was stoned off my ass. Honestly I'm surprised I was able to compose a blog post that day without mentioning unicorns or penguins. 

The Next 72 Hours - Again, I don't exactly remember everything. The incision area was slightly sore, but it wasn't bad at all. I had to be intubated during surgery so my throat was rather sore and I had a cough. Eventually it got to a point where my ribs and stomach muscles hurt from coughing. Overall it wasn't bad though, I was able to sit, stand, and walk with crutches. I was able to paint my nails the day after surgery ;)

The Next Few Days - The one problem with having the anti-nausea patch is that you don't throw up all the crap in your system, so it takes longer for everything to leave your system. There were are a few days when I felt verrrryyyyy heavy-headed. Bread would help for a little while but it would keep coming back. One day I felt even worse than usual, turns out I was running a 100.1 fever. Once the fever burned off I started feeling better (and blogging again). 

One Week - The surgery site was a teensy bit sore, but again nothing terrible. I started walking around my house sans crutches and I would only use one crutch when going out. 

10 Days Post Op - The staples came out and my incision was exposed and allowed to breathe! Me thinks at least a few parts of it are gonna keloid and I might end up with a good ol "Railroad track" scar from the staples themselves, but it's hard to tell.

11 Days Post Op - My incision does not like feeling exposed. It's in an awkward area and it does not like it when I move. I thought I felt it ripping a few times. Some bandaids were places on the scar to keep that skin from moving.

The Rest of that Damn Week - Holy crap my scar hurt. Now I feel closer to Harry Potter. Whenever I got up from either laying down or sitting my scar would hurt like a mofo. Without a doubt this was the most painful part of my surgery. I opted to relax for a few days and let my scar heal. The pain started to decrease with each passing day. 

Now - My scar almost feels back to normal. I hold it sometimes when I get up, but whatever pain I do have from it is very bearable. I can walk without my crutches, and without much of a limp. I'll probably be using my crutch outside of my home for a little while longer. 

All in all I am sooooooooooooooo pleased with how everything turned out. I was bracing for massive mobility restrictions and I lot of pain. Thank goodness it wound up being the total opposite. Even though there were some minor bumps in the recovery road, it was still really freaking easy.

Crippie's Tippie - Sometimes it's good to prepare for the worst. You're prepared in the event that it hits the fan, and you are extraordinarily happy when things go well. It's a win/win.

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Echo Echo Echhhhhoooooooo


I hope all my readers had a wonderful Wednesday. My day was relatively eventful. I went to get an echocardiogram today.

As some of you might remember, my heart rate gets a little fast after surgeries, and my GP noticed that my heart rate was high during my pre-op. So he ordered me to get an echocardiogram to see if there is something wrong with my heart. Well, today I went to the hospital for said echo. I wasn't nervous or anything about the test, I really doubt that there is anything wrong with my heart. The echocardiogram itself was relatively easy and I got to see some super neat images of my heart. It kinda hurt sometimes when the technician was pressing on some of my rib tumors, but other than it was a breeze. While I don't have any official results of the test, my super awesome technician told me that even though my heart rate is on the high side, it's still within the normal range. Also, there is nothing physically wrong with my heart. YAY CRIPPIE'S HEART! I still need to have some blood work done to rule out thyroid issues, but I consider this a small victory. (Just so y'all know, I'm singing "I AM THE CHAMPIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON" to myself while I'm writing this). 

In other news my incision is continuing to heal up. It still hurts if I get up from a sitting position, but the pain fades with each passing day. I'm also starting to regain some feeling in the surgery site. I couldn't feel parts of my lower spine and side for about a week or so. Now I can feel my spine and my hip bone. That means I can feel my hip sans Fanny. Let me tell y'all, it is the best feeling ever. The best way to describe the feeling is comfortable. I'm just laying down blogging and my hip doesn't hurt. No pressure, no massive tumor irritating a muscle, NOTHING. It's moments like this that make me realize how much pain Fanny caused me. My hip doesn't feel completely normal by any means, the tumors inside of it still bother me, but it feels like a massive weight has been removed. This feeling of relief is fan-freaking-tastic!

I've for a busy day ahead of me tomorrow, I've got an appointment with my pain doctor and a buncha errands to run. I should probably get my comfortable tumor-free ass to sleep. PEACE!

Crippie's Tippie - Be nice to the technicians performing tests on you, they might be able to tell you results before the doctors do ;)

Monday, October 1, 2012

Sweet Charity


I hope all of my fellow crippled comrades had a splendid weekend. Mine was purdy damn awesome. As I've mentioned maaaaannnnnnyyyyy times throughout the past couple of weeks, my BFF and I are hosting a Scentsy Party benefitting the MHE Coalition, and on Saturday we had an open house/party for it. I was a social creature and had a blast with my friends and family. The open house was a huuuugggggeeeeeeeeeee success. I want to thank everyone who has contributed to the fundraiser thus far, and I want to give a special shout out to my BFF who is donating her commission for the cause. YOU GUYS ARE SO FLIPPIN' AWESOME, LOVE Y'ALL!

I can't believe how much I actually did this weekend, apart from the whole being social thing. I walked up and down the stairs a buncha times, stood for rather long periods, did lots of bending and moving in general. Not bad for less than two weeks post-op! I also can't believe how active I was considering how much my damn incision has been hurting. Seriously, this has probably been the most painful part of my damn surgery. Ya see, now that bandages and staples are off, my incision is free to tighten and heal naturally. This is usually uncomfortable, but the tightening paired with fact that the skin around incision moves whenever I do makes for a rather painful feeling. It kinda feels like my skin rips whenever I get up. Of course its not actually ripping, but it feels like it. I'm probably gonna cover the scar with bandaids tomorrow to help everything stay in place. I reckon I should also try to not move whenever possible and let my incision heal. Regardless of how much my damn scar hurt, this weekend was awesome and I wouldn't trade it for anything.

Scentsy Buddies!
The Scentsy MHE Fundraiser will continue online through November 3rd. If any of y'all want to do some holiday shopping for a good cause you should check it out. Also, sorry if I'm annoying people by constantly talking about the it, I swear I won't talk about it as much now.

Crippie's Tippie - Scensty Parties are surprisingly fun and entertaining
Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...